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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Sad Mimosa Lady

When I got to work I was told that I would be serving a party of 25 that day. Joy. Rapture. I got it into my head that the people would be cool, hip, lots of fun ready for brunch! Sadly, it turned out to be 23 premenopausal women who had just completed some walk-a-thon and came into bitch and whine about how difficult it was to complete. One lady got there early and came right up to me and asked for one of the special five dollar mimosas. "Sure, no problem." Then she begins to tell me that she needs it to be in a regular juice glass and she needs to pay for it now and she needs to drink it quickly before her daughter gets there and sees her drinking. Sounds like the bitch is not only dealing with the change of life, but she is a closet alcoholic too. A winning combo! She slides me the five bucks on the down low obviously forgetting that in this country we have this crazy little thing called tax. And tip. So I print out a check for $5.42 and laid it on her table along with the five dollars. Well, the ovaries hit the fan because her daughter saw it. The mother comes up to me and chastises me for bringing her a check and telling me the whole point was for her daughter to not know. What she failed to realize was that I did not give a rat's ass. I want my 42 cents, bitch. "Well, my daughter saw the check and started asking me questions about it and wanted to know what it was for and blah blah blah, my ovaries are dried up..." I very politely explained that I had to present her with a check because she had not seen the total yet (and I did not want to front her the 42 cents). She pulled out a dollar that was more wrinkled than her neck was and gave it to me. Later when they were gone, I went to get the check presenter for the single mimosa and she had taken the five dollar bill out of it. She stiffed me. She walked out on that check just like her youth had walked out her. I didn't care. I voided the mimosa and moved on with my day. Unlike her, my future was bright and carefree and I was allowed to drink mimosas in front of whomever I please.


Maryann said...

I just wouldn't have put the five dollar bill into the presenter thing again - maybe I'm weird like that and think you should have printed a ticket out with how much she still owed on it.

Would that have been possible? Would that have been mean?

I think the answer to the first is probably no, and the answer to the second is who gives a damn.

ab said...

haha..i have been reading a couple of your a server myself I found this blog hilarious!..oh and thanks for the rants im going to forward these to my fellow servers...