Maybe I have said this before, but it bears repeating. I cannot stand when I ask someone what they want to drink and they respond with some dumb ass response like "what do you have?" It makes me want to grab their nipples, twist them off and use them as a garnish on their Cosmopolitan. Seriously? What do we have? We are a bar. We have what all bars have. There's a pretty good chance we'll have what you want unless you're asking for the milk of the aloe vera plant, a glass of water from the Fountain of Youth, or Tang. And then they look at me like they think I'm really going to recite a laundry list of every possible beverage. I would think that most people have a pretty good idea of what they want to drink. Don't we all have our usual suspects? A Coke, a gimlet, a water. But maybe this asswipe was new to our planet and really wasn't sure what we offered. Perhaps I should have been more patient with our inter-planetary friend but I was not in the mood. I responded with "the usual things that a bar has to drink, so I'll let you think it over and come back later." I don't have time for that shit. If he really needs help, there is thing we have in the club that is made for that purpose. It's called a menu. Look at it. Choose something. I will bring it.
So let's review. If you have a question about a beverage, make it a good one. Like "what reds do you have by the glass?" or "do you have any non-alcoholic beer?" or "if I have six margaritas, you're not gonna to cut me off, are you?" (Okay that last question might be just for me when I go to Margarita Mondays.) Just don't ask some broad-based stupid ass question like "what do you have?" It will piss me off. And pissing off your server right before he hands you your Coors Light is not a good idea.