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Saturday, October 8, 2011

A Comment on Comments

Last year I wrote a blog post regarding Cracker Barrel. It was a positive , upbeat, praise-my-waitress kind of post so who in the world would take issue with it? I'll tell you who: my arch nemesis (other than Reichen), Anonymous. Observe:

first off, you're an idiot. i work at Cracker Barrel and the stars DO NOT signify how many years you've been employed and you are a LIAR because you have NEVER seen 7 stars ANYWHERE. The highest you can achieve is FOUR!!! and that is based on your level of numbers you produce per hour for the store you work in!!! Don't talk about stuff you don't know about.

Ouch, Anonymous, why so harsh? i must commend Anonymous on her spelling and punctuation while her use of capitals needs some polishing. i stand corrected. The stars DO NOT represent the number of years the waitress has worked there!!! i guess i did not actually see a waitress with seven stars then. Maybe i dreamed it in the most perfect dream ever where i was sitting on a pile of biscuits next to a maple syrup waterfall while a waitress made of bacon fed me cheesy hash browns with a fork made of BUTTER!!! Thank you for the clarification, Anonymous, but here's my beef. Why the hell are you so upset about it? Chill the hell out, lady. i understand the level of pride you must have for the Barrel of Cracker for i too would be bursting at the seams with pride if i got to wear one of those brown polyester apron with the yellow embroidered STARS!!! i truly am a liar, liar pants on fire, hang it on a wire, liar asshole face. i totally deserve the scolding from you. How dare i misrepresent what the STARS mean at CRACKER BARREL!! i will no longer talk about stuff i don't know, i promise. (That is another lie, by the way).

Good luck, Anonymous and thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to clarify the whole star ISSUE. Many a sleepless night has passed with me in bed pondering if the blog post i wrote over a year ago was accurate or not. i sure do appreciate YOUR comment. Thank you. i mean, THANK YOU!!!



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23 comments:

Doug and Mary Ann said...

Too funny!

Anonymous...but not THAT one said...

It does seem a bit blown out of proportion to be so upset over such a minor detail. I mean, sure, they can go head and mention the incorrect information...but they didn't have to get all Madame Dufarge on ya. It was one tiny sentence...sheez people.
Furthermore, I wonder if the gay-hatin' issue with CB has to do with location to some extent. There's one near where I live that employs a couple rather effeminite guys. That's not to say that does or does not make them gay...but I just couldnt see this particular CB allowing them to wear the ladies knee-high sparkly froo-froo costume leggings over their uniform (of which I had to compliemnt them on their awesomeness) if they had a problem with it.
Then again, I do live in northern Illinios and parts of the Chicago area are known to be more welcoming of such things.

Noelle said...

Please don't write like that anymore. Your lazy pinkies not striking up the capitols gives me a mini-stroke. :)

This is silly who really takes Cracker Barrel so seriously. I knew you didn't know exactly what you were talking about!

ChiTown Girl said...

I wish I could leave a witty comment, but I can't stop laughing long enough to formulate a decent sentence.

Steve LaFleur said...

You're both wrong. The stars represent the number of heart attacks per day each waitress is responsible for by skyrocketing cholestrol levels into the Elvis stratosphere. Jeesh.

Anonymous said...

You should feel lucky that you don't wait tables at a place where these comment cards mean 35 people feel this way! It's way over rated to say the least!

Mary A. said...

Cracker Barrel has yummy pancakes, but for some reason I always walk out of there with a sequined sweatshirt or a mug that says "old Fart" or a figurine of an angel.

Their motto should be: Eat Yummy Pancakes and then spend the rest of your money on clutter.

J9 said...

As funny as your response to anon., the responses here are even better. I was trying to figure out HOW one would just run across an ancient post like that - other than reading all of your posts as a stalker. I did a google search of "cracker barrel waitress" and your post is the 5th result, but the 4th result is a yahoo answers on what the stars represent - the only answer there is seniority. So if I was miss high and mighty anon. I would have reamed yahoo answers first, not you...
Or maybe it is a wanna be blogger who wants to write a cracker barrel waitress blog, and wanted to check out the competition first. Maybe it's stay at home mom, who has to reenter the work force after her DH left her for the neighbor next door, who was always such a dear....

SlumSlut said...

If you do a really good job a Cracker Barrel, Fuddruckers will hire you no problem.

Oh and I have gay friends too ;)

sally said...

LOL, Bitchy!

Some Sort of Fairy said...

People like that, not you, are the reason that so many in this world hold contemptuous opinions of servers.

Donda said...

that is the BEST dream EVER!!

Obsidian Butterfly said...

Hilarious...Who thought someone would get so bent out of shape over something so silly?

I worked at CB for a glorious 3 months. I was told the stars had to do with how knowledgeable you were about the menu, food safety practices, customer service, etc. Definitely an odd place to work with more appearance rules than a Catholic high school.

Anonymous said...

its a f**king chain restaurant...who gives a S**t about it. They all suck..Why do people ate at these places when there are so many other great restaurants to eat at...Food in a bag, who cares

Practical Parsimony said...

I try my best to stay out of Cracker Barrel, so I did not know you lied. I really don't care what the stars mean.

SkippyMom said...

What is so funny about anonymous tirade is that a nice commentator came along a few months before and kindly explained what the stars meant. [I think her name was Mary] She had worked at CB for some time and knew the protocol, but was sweet about explaining it. Then along comes Anon who practically blew a gasket yelling about it and was actually wrong [according to Mary] anyway. heehee

CrackerbarrelPAR4 said...

Umm I hate to break it to anonymous but they are wrong. I don't even know what they were trying to say. The stars are your PAR level. You start out as a rising star, after about a month once you pass your first evaluation and if you score high enough on your test, which test your menu knowledge , and a few more stupid things then you become a PAR 1. To get to a PAR 4 or have 4 pretty little stars you it takes about 18 months maybe more. And every part of that hell hole has stars they just don't have to wear them. I am a PAR 4 skill trainer in serving, PAR 3 hostess, PAR 1 in Dish, PAR grillcook, I also am a full time SA and can do prep and retail. I have helped in 2 store openings. So anonymous can fuck off I can quote you from CB's handbook. I bet Anonymous wear's 2 pairs of earrings to work, no belt, and finger nail polish, and her hair touches her shoulder. I've been asked to go into management at CB but it is one of the worst companies to work for. If anonymous really wants I think I still have one of the handbooks I can post word for word on here want CB says about PAR, and anything else you want to know.

Damp Flannel said...

Jesus! I appear to have stumbled into some form of parallel universe. Does it really take someone a whole year of jaw quivering rage before managing to compose themselves enough to complain about (alleged) incorrect facts over some star system on a staff uniform? (And still misuse capital letters?) Clearly this person is yet to discover the delights of alcohol. Or a sense of humour. Or going out. Or having a life. Or not being a knob.

Anonymous said...

Why do you not use upper case I's?

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