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Friday, February 3, 2012

How to Win Free Shoes

I am giving away another pair of fabulous (FREE) work shoes from my friends at Shoes For Crews. They gave me a pair a few weeks ago for writing a review about them and I, in return, asked for a few pair to give to you guys. I already gave away two pair and now I am giving away another one with this contest. Very simple. The best caption for the picture below will win the free damn shoes. In the words of Barefoot Contessa, "how easy is that?" Just write your caption in the comment section and the winner will be decided by a group of esteemed individuals of food service industry professionals (just me and a friend of mine...). Make it it witty, make it funny, make it yours. Or you can post your comment on the Bitchy Waiter Facebook page. All captions will be considered. The deadline to write a caption is Monday, February 6th at midnight EST. I will announce the winner some time on Tuesday, February 7th.

Important: if you write it in the comment section of this blog post, please make sure you do so as a registered commenter and not Anonymous. I must be able to get in touch with you. No anonymous entrants will be considered.


write your caption, bitches


Yes, I know someone is going to bash me for posting a picture of a baby that appears to be on the verge of becoming dinner, but get over it. I am sure this did not really happen. Worst case scenario: it did really happen and the baby was over-cooked and gristly and they had to throw it out leaving them with no dinner and no baby. Bummer. Please share this with your friends because it isn't just baby who needs a new pair of shoes. (The baby in the picture actually does not need a new pair of shoes. He needs butter and salt.)



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17 comments:

JoeinVegas said...

He should have at least plucked that little fellow before cooking. It would make the skin crispy.

(don't put me in for the shoes, let some deserving food service person that stands on their feet all day get them)

Confessions from the Hairdresser said...

That picture, is almost as ABHORRENT as this photo that I saw the other day on Facebook of a child that some disturbed soul had actually DUCT-TAPED to a CHAIR.

As you can imagine, photos like these are completely DESTRUCTIVE to our fragile and moral society. What if a person saw this picture and accidentally got CONFUSED and proceeded to roast their own tender and delicious baby in the oven ?!?!?!?!
Without hurting the integrity of this post, perhaps you could substitute the child abuse cannibalism promoting photo with something depicting children in a healthier and happier context, perhaps with ponies. Glittery ponies.

Cookieprincess said...

Preheat to 350 degrees

A dash of sex
A splash of mom
A pinch of dad
Lightly salt
Sprinkle with breadcrumbs

Fresh baked finger lickin' fetus!

Karen Junge said...

I followed the directions and this wasn't suppose to happen. It was suppose to come out a babe (like a hot babe) not a baby. I guess i have to start from scratch. But what am i to do with thing..

DawnStar said...

I AM NOT A TATER TOT!

Peridot (G+P) said...

Hey Stan-um, Loretta! The Romans have figured out a way that you can have babies! All you have to do is make ten easy payments of twenty aurei and you too can have your own Brutus Brand Baby-making kit. All applications for the Brutus Brand Baby-Making kit must be made in person at the Coliseum in Rome.
(No refunds or cancellations accepted, all purchases are final)

Lauren said...

Soylent Veal---Now fresher than ever!

Karen J said...

I know I copied the recipe from the duggars website for there tator TOTs casserole.. But for some reason thiers don't look like this.. Hmmm what did I do wrong...

kaoswrestler said...

The new quick and easy breakfest from Jimmy Dean's, for the man on the go.

euphoric_mania said...

"I fuckin dare you to let your crotch fruit play in my sugar caddies. I fuckin dare you."

n. said...

nice vest, jerk.

Dead Trees and Silver Screens said...

Unattended children will be cooked and served with ranch dressing!

I told you not to change that babies diaper at the table!

Our restaurant now has free inmeal child care!

Now a childfree restaurant!

Mommy didn't tip!

I want my baby back ribs!

Lorenza said...

Did no one notice that they actually took one of the oven racks out so the baby could fit? It's sitting on top of the stove...

Who drinks orange slurpees anyway?? Everyone knows roast baby and orange slurpee is not a good pairing.

Allie said...

And now just 30 minutes in the oven and our Baby casserole will be ready to be served....

n. said...

no thanks, i prefer dark meat.

Gene Perry said...

babies should not be put in a casserole ... they really should be bar-be-qued

MEK said...

"I got my recipe from one of Martha Stewart's cook books, but feel free to tweak it or to use your own so your baby is roasted to your liking."