I found a letter to Dear Abby this weekend that caught my eye and I had to respond. I loves me some Dear Abby, but sometimes her responses are just a little too sweet.
DEAR ABBY: Last night at a restaurant, my husband and I were surprised to see a male server wearing a blond wig and full makeup.
I was, to say the least, shocked and glad we hadn’t brought the children, ages 11 and 14, with us.
How do you explain something like that to an 11-year-old? The 14-year-old would be able to “get it.”
What kind of policies are in place for restaurants in cases like
this? What if customers are offended? Could I request a different server
or just leave? Your comments would be appreciated.— TAKEN ABACK IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR TAKEN ABACK: In California, people have the
legal right to dress in a style not typical of their gender without fear
of discrimination or retaliation. That right is protected by state law.
If customers find it offensive, they can either request a different
server or take their business elsewhere. Presumably, the customer would
pay for food that had already been prepared.
Because children today grow up quickly and are less sheltered than in
past decades, I recommend you explain to your 11-year-old not all
people are alike, and the importance of treating others with respect.
It’s called reality.
Okay, Abby gave a pretty good answer there but I think that she needed to give a little bit of tough love to stupid ass Taken Aback. Here is my response:
DEAR TAKEN ABACK: Hello? It's 2012. We are no longer living in a fucking fantasy world where gender roles are are cut and dry. If your waiter wants to wear a blond wig and makeup then he can wear the fucking blond wig and makeup. Personally, I would be much more offended if a waitress showed up at my table wearing blue eyeshadow and frosted tipped winged hair. Talk about offensive. As for your 11 and 14 year-olds, thank God they were spared the "horror" of seeing someone living his life the way he wants to live it without the need to hide his true self. Your kids should be so lucky to have the courage that the waiter has. If your letter is any indication of how close-minded you are, God help your children if one of them ends up being gay or lesbian. They will most likely be fearful of your response and try to keep it hidden and we all know how great that goes.
As for policies in "cases like this," who cares? Restaurants should be more concerned with policies that keep narrow-minded assholes out of their dining rooms. Sure, you had the option to request another server since it must have been truly an awful experience for you to eat your chicken wings while having to look at a man in a wig. How did you ever survive? And yes, you had the option of leaving. Had you done that, you could have walked out with your head held high so that all the world would know you're an idiot. I'm sure if you had, every server would have thanked their lucky stars that they didn't have to serve your bigoted ass.
In the world today, I am certain that your kids have seen much more shocking things on the Internet than a waiter in a wig. If you think it would have been difficult to "explain" to your kids, you are not giving them near enough credit. Kids today are pretty smart. They know what gay is. They know what transsexual is. And they also know that the chicken wings you ordered are non-organic and were thawed out in the microwave. Give 'em some credit.
Thank you for your letter. It serves as a reminder that no matter how many steps the LGBT movement has made, there are still many more to take. It takes people like you to show the rest of the world how silly it is to be so petty over something as inconsequential as wig and a makeup. Get the fuck over it.
The Bitchy Waiter
Once again, I think I have proven that I totally deserve my own advice column. Damn, I would be good at that. I can't imagine why Huffington Post has not contacted me yet. If you agree, please "like" this story. Or whatever.
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