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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

A Comment on Comments

What is it with people who leave these nasty ass comments as Anonymous? Very rarely does someone leave a comment that is less than kind and then have the balls to sign their name. Even if they did sign their name, who fucking cares? What am I gonna do? Go to your blogspot profile and then send you an email? Oooh, scary. Check out what this anonymous douchebag wrote:

I don't tip and I'm American. I usually get the feeling from most waiters/waitress that they look at their customers as paychecks rather then people. If you don't make enough money being a server you can quit. I too once worked a minimum wage job and unfortunately for me, society didn't deem me worthy of tips. I worked at McDonalds by the way.


Hey Anonymous, you can read this post for a full explanation of why I keep my job. As for you, you never tip because you feel that "most" of your servers look at you as a paycheck? Guess what, asshat, that's what you are. And if you feel that most do, what about those few who don't? They don't get tipped either? I'm sorry that you had the misfortune of working in a McDonald's (it has an apostrophe by the way, idiot.) but you didn't get tips there because you weren't hired as a tipped employee. You made minimum wage, right? Waiters have a different minimum wage which is about $2.13 an hour depending on the state. If you consistently do not tip and you go into the same restaurant more than a few times, I can guarantee that the servers hate you. I can't verify that they would do anything to your food, but it is very possible. Not likely since most servers (myself excluded of course) are highly professional people who take pride in their jobs. But they definitely don't want you in their station. It goes something like this:

Waiter A: Oh shit, there's that guy who used to work at McDonald's.
Waiter B: Hey did you know that McDonald's has an apostrophe in it?
Waiter A: Of course I do. Only dumb ass ignorant assholes who used to work at one wouldn't know that. Duh. Anyway, it's your turn to serve this guy because I had him last time and he never tips.
Waiter B: I know, I hate him. He's always looking at me like I'm just this person that's supposed to bring him his food. He's creepy.
Waiter A: Yeah, I know. I wonder why he doesn't tip.
Waiter B: I dunno. Maybe he can't afford it. Oh well, I'll serve him and hope for the best. That's what we do, right?
Waiter A: Right. Don't be mean to him though and spit in his food or anything. I feel sorry for him. I mean, he used to work at McDonald's.
Waiter B: I would never spit in his food. That would be so immature of me and unprofessional. I'll ask a cook to do it.
Waiter A: Yeah, that's totally what I was thinking. Cool.



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60 comments:

Mark W said...

I really enjoy your dialogues. I'd love to see them acted out in short little YouTube videos sometime!

Lisa said...

Dear Anonymous,

You're a fucking touch-hole.

Sincerely,
Lisa (aka Once was a Bitchy Server and is now a Bitchy Cranky SAHM)

Cypres said...

Dear Bitchy Waiter -

Your hostility and sarcasm thrills me! I mean it! I just cannot get enough of your blog. You make me laugh out loud. You say the things I wish I could, but don't have the balls to.

Thank you SO MUCH for doing what you do!!

Patrick Maguire said...

Perfect. Only spineless douchebags leave anonymous, vitriolic, hateful comments. Unfortunately, the world is full of them.

Patrick Maguire
Boston, MA

Practical Parsimony said...

My friend went to the same place for lunch everyday. She ordered two meals and dessert and never tipped. A waitress confronted her about not tipping. My friend told me she did not have the money to tip. She was always talking about needing to lose weight. I was just horrified she would 1)eat so much, and 2) not tip at the same time. My friend got all hurt and almost cried when I told her so and told her to leave off an entree or dessert, and TIP. Anyway, she called the manager and complained about the waitress. I advised to eat elsewhere because she never knew what she was eating now. Oh, my friend had a professional job and her husband is an attorney. They lost their home because she spent so much having food delivered to their home, food he never saw or ate. SAD! Actually, I was not so horrified she ate so much since she weighed over 300 lbs.

Mama Sky said...

Anonymous is just a pathetic loser who doesn't have the backbone to stand behind their comments. I can only imagine that the same can be said for their everyday sad life. Muttering to their selves after the threat of an adult conversation is over and going home to their many cats and eating tuna fish with them.

Kalei's Best Friend said...

Hey Anonymous: u MADE the choice to work at crappy McD's... and how do u know that waiters/waitresses look at the customer as a paycheck??? If that were the case that would follow suit for any profession... Think the Prez of the U.S. has that attitude??? His paycheck is not all that high.. Not enough money for me to take on the complaints and rude ass remarks of so called citizens.

Decubitus said...

Some people who sign as anonymous might not have a blog account. But then some people might not have the balls to stand behind their opinion and so post without a name, just as you said.

But the way I see it, anonymous or not, not everyone is always going to agree. Yes, I can see why it's more annoying if you don't know who's doing the commenting but that's life... Just have to learn to put up with it and keep your chin up, I guess!

Alexa O said...

BW, Please don't moderate your comments! I love watching you tear your haters to shreds.

Besides, they make such fools of themselves on their own, it's not like they're convincing anyone... If anything, the "asshat" (god I love that word) who left the anonymous non-tipping confession has convinced everyone else that classy, educated people tip really well. And ignorant fuckwads don't tip at all.

Which, of course, is true.

Molly Malone said...

I just don't get people who don't tip. I'm from England, and we don't tip there - it's included - so it took me a while to figure it out when I moved here. But now, unless the service is beyond wank, I always tip 20%. It's rude not to.
And Anonymous - take a gasoline douche, you moron.

Always Me said...

I am constantly astonished that there are still people out there who don't know servers have a much lower minumum wage. The whole reason they get paid so low is because of TIPS. The pay scale is assuming there will be tips to make up the difference. I always tip, in fact I make it a point to overtip whenever possible. Except for this one time we only had 5 cents more than the bill was, but I came back the next day with a $10 (our bill was only $30) in an envelope and asked the manager to deliver it to her. I hope she forgives me.

Mary A. said...

I think it's hysterical how he (I think anonomous is a he) justifies his lack of tipping as a MORAL issue.

Because waiters who look at customers as a paycheck are EVIL.

Most waiters I know are independently wealthy and only work at Johnny Carinos or wherever because they love people and the pervasive corporate culture.

pixienighingale said...

As someone who has never been a waiter but has a grandfather who overtips (20$ on a 20$ bill with some waitresses), I try to tip the appropriate amount every time I am out (20% standard, more if you're really good).

And really, how can that condition apply that if you get tipped, then it can automatically be considered enough of your income that you can pay them 2$ an hour, UNDER minimum wage? That just does not make sense. AT ALL.

Laura Leane said...

I ALWAYS TIP! I have never worked for tips, but I understand the horrific difference between minimum wage and waitstaff wage. You guys sweat your asses off to bring us our food and still manage to plaster a smile on your face while you wipe the grease off your forehead and ask if there's anything else we need. Bless you all! 20% isn't enough, but 15% certainly isn't too much to ask for.

HOWEVER! I do not tip with more than the coin change at places with tip jars on the counter that the employees hand me my food from. I have to get my ass up when you call my number; you don't get a tip. Stop with the jar! You're making it harder for those who actually deserve tips to get them because everyone is so "over" giving tips because of you.

That's my take. Love you Bitchy :-*

U. Auto Know. It's the Truth! said...

Think About It! These people are just that, Anonymous! They don't matter. They don't tip cause they don't get it! Why we are sitting at the table with the best view, killer service, Great food and they are still waiting to be seated! They are stuck in a dead end, hourly, clock watching job and it's our fault cause we enjoy life! That's right, we actually laugh at your type, after we MF you for you for being a Cheap Ass and we move on to other people enjoying life, that Get It!
You don't sign your name cause You Don't Count! Nobody Cares about you or your opinions and I guarantee you your always blaming Every one else for your misfortunes! By the way, "We Are All Paychecks" IDIOT", thats why we work!

Anonymous said...

not everyone cares to have a blogspot profile. but funny narrative.

B.Graham said...

if you "can't afford" to tip, you can't afford to eat out. plain and simple. go to the fucking grocery store tightwad.

Wendy said...

OH MY GOD!!! You are the BEST Bitchy Bitch, and now i wanna be your STALKER!!!
...or your best friend. Whichever.
=-)

The Crap Blog Detective said...

"most servers are highly professional people who take pride in their jobs."

BRILLIANT!!! You made my day, had quite a laugh at your expense.

Thank you.

Nadia @ www.lavidaaloha.blogspot.com said...

Hi Bitchy Waiter,

Ever since discovering your blog, my day is a little brighter knowing that there's someone out there who likes to bitch about their job as much as I do!

Holla!

Anonymous said...

If I had a waiter that had an attitude like you, I wouldn't tip them either. I would probably just leave you a penny. To show you just how much you mean to me.

Jennifer Scavone said...

Some people dont have a blog, so that could be a reason, but I think a specific someone is doing it to you just to push you're buttons, in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

Seriously!! Someone bagged on you as "Anonymous" in this comment thread??? On your post about anonymous comments?? Really. Has to be the same DB! Just has to be.

I'm also very curious to know why someone with that sort of attitude towards your persona("If I had a server like you...") even bothers to read this blog at all.

PS-I'm leaving this one anonymous just for shits & giggles...Kate aka RunnerMom (previously bitchy server, still bitchy caterer)

chelsypillsbury said...

You are such a sassy bitch. I love it. Seriously. Your wit and brutal honesty inspire me!

The Chick in the Chair Perspective said...

It amazes me that people don't tip and they think its OK. Shouldn't be surprising that the same person who believes that working at McDonald's is the same as waiting on people the way you do. No wonder he doesn't leave his name... he doesn't want people to know how incredibly stupid he is.

female, I shit you not! said...

If he/she can't afford to tip...
STAY HOME or take it to go!
My hubby & myself don't make enough on social security to file an income tax.
We eat out once a week. Two 6oz. Outback Specials & one diet coke. & leave $30 for our $23.59 order
There is no better dining out experience than having happy waitstaff waiting on you. :0)
Our Outback has some kickass servers.

G said...

Probably those Anon's are too thin skinned to take any kind of criticism to thier words, so there you go.

Sincerely,

G (who on four seperate occasions delivered pizzas to make ends meet. you definitely got to know who didn't tip and you drove/delivered the pizza as you saw fit)

The Ranter's Box said...

I get that some readers may not have blogger accounts and therefore have to comment anonymously. However, it does seem like the biggest arseholes (when it comes to leaving comments) are by those whom are anonymous.

One of those stupid f*ckers did the same thing on my blog and I dedicated an entire rebuttal post toward ripping them a new one!

I wonder if shit-for-brains 'Anonymous' who doesn't believe in tipping servers is the same wanker who stirred up all the shit in your vegetarian post?

Servers deserve tips for the service they provide. If a customer can't afford or isn't willing to leave a tip for their server then the customer should spare everyone the misery and just stay the frick home!

Anonymous you are an absolute DICK!

Bitchy Waiter, you rock!
xo The Empress

http://rantersbox.blogspot.com

CarrieAnn said...

My best friend from high school got all passive aggressive on my blog and left me anonymous comments under the pseudonym "Fred." She had no idea that I knew it was her until I tracked where my readers were coming from (all 2 of them) and narrowed it down. Funny...she doesn't talk to me since I called her out on it. People are weird.

Doug and Mary Ann said...

BW, you are a great writer and I really enjoy your humor. Very witty.

As for the tipping, people who don't tip wait staff probably also aren't tipping anyone who provides them with service - newspaper delivery, bar tender, hair stylist, dog groomer, pizza delivery, etc. What's the matter with people like that? They weren't raised right!

Anonymous said...

Bitchy Waiter: As probably the 40 millionth person to leave you a comment, I just thought I'd throw this out there. You are my hero.

Anonymous said...

hahaha I am not the same anon as the one who left a comment on your vegetarian post. I am anon 12:06... or some odd number like that. And yes, I do it just to push bitchy's buttons. ;) although I laugh at a lot of his posts, sometimes he pisses me off so I comment :)

Anonymous said...

I have been unemployed for a year and a half and I still tip 20%. If you don`t have enough money to leave a tip then you should stay home. (or eat at McD`s)

badbadwebbis said...

When my daughters were little, my standard tip was 25%, because yeah, my kids were the ones who dropped food all over the floor.

I tried to keep it relatively clean, but rugrats are nasty. Of course, I mostly took them to Chili's or Olive Garden where the food belongs on the floor anyway. But I always felt bad.

Meb said...

as long yo love and enjoy your jobs don't bother small thing or what people say about

sally said...

I was a waitress for years and so now that I can afford to eat out often I tip very, very well. There are a few restaurants in town we frequent where they know us. Because of our tipping habits we regularily receive free dessert and drinks, we never need a reservation, we normally get the best table available, and the waitstaff are very, very nice to us. Also, my pizza/chinese is ALWAYS on time and hot and perfect. At this point I am convinced the delivery guy checks our order.
While I was waiting tables years ago, I NEVER spit on anyone's food or did anything gross to it, I just could never do anything like that. BUT, I saw a few who did. AND THEY DID IT TO THE ASSHOLES WHO NEVER TIP.

So my point is, it actually PAYS to tip well. Smart people know this. Small minded idiots don't.

Manda said...

We look at you like a paycheck because that is what you are. Do you expect us to seriously care anything else about you? Yeah ill put on a little show and pretend like I care if your traveling or care to know what you did that day. We get paid nothing weekly, do you know what it is like to have a negative paycheck? If you can't afford to tip or don't want to tip for a service provided to you, don't go out and cook your own food. I hope the servers you get give you really crappy service, no drink refill, don't clear your table, 20 minute ticket because you aren't worth any of our time. If you go to the same place on more than one occassion, please be aware the servers do remember you and will remember you not tipping. Ughhh your such a doucheeee!

Anyway- love you bitchy! Also got your back

Raisin Hale said...

i have a word for people like anonymous... i'm not sure if it's blog friendly, but i would love it if you included it one of your posts. it's a word that i think is a perfect description for most of the customers we encounter everyday. that word is cuntsicle.

Kristin said...

I'm a server & for those of you who don't tip you should know that I still have to tip out on your non tipping ass. So b/c you decided to be a ass clown & leave me NOTHING I now have to PAY for waiting on you. Yes, I still have to tip out the bussers and/or bartenders. Where I work it automatically comes out of my money so I can't tip them accordingly b/c you didn't tip. Also, if you can't afford to tip then you should STAY HOME!

leia said...

mr. asshole anonymous needs to watch a little movie called "waiting." their number 1 rule is don't fuck with people who handle your food! :D keep up the funny blogs, bitchy waiter <3

Luke Cloherty said...

Surely posting vitriolic, hateful comments under the pseudonym 'The Bitchy Waiter' is rather spineless. Also to correct anonymous' grammar is a tad pathetic. The pomposity it must take to thumb through somebody's comment and find out where missed punctuation marks are (which could just be typing mistakes rather than poor grammar)is immeasurable.

Unfortunately we do not all agree on everything. The person who left the comment was merely stating their point of view, much like you do in this wonderful blog. You've just taken exception to somebody telling you how it is. How ironic.

Kind Regards

Luke Cloherty, England.

dirtydisher said...

I put an ivisible IP tracker in my blog. After I track the anon's info, I use Google map to find their house. Then I travel to where they live, wait for them to go to work, break into their house and scrub my ass crack with thier toothbrush. I also spit in their milk. I hope this helps. :)

Elise-Lucie said...

I've noticed that there has been a lot more annoying comments by anonymous douchebags on your blog lately - or maybe it is just me...However, it is always satisfying to read the posts where you reply to those unpleasant character with that delightful bitchiness you are now known for ;) Thx for making me smile

Anonymous said...

Hey just an FYI, in California the minimum wage is $8.00/hr and it also applies to tipped staff. Also if you are in SF or LA things are pretty expensive, I suggest a move.

Anonymous said...

Just to clarify when I said "things are pretty expensive" I meant the food (and thus the bill and the tip) would be high. Also the cost of living is pretty high too, but if you live just outside of the city and commute in and you're golden.

Rambling Crunchy Housewife said...

Umm...as a former McDonald's Employee myself...

Its part of McDonald's corporate policy to pay OVER minimum wage.

I worked for one when min wage was $5.15/hr. I made $6.20/hr AND got EVERYTHING half priced, including dollar menu. I hear now it excludes the dollar menu and is 20% unless its your shift then its 50%

I'd say over a dollar over min wage wasn't so bad for a 16 year old.

Say Hello and Wave Goodbye said...

HA! So there stupid anonymous! Get a freaking life & learn how to spell! Nice going Bitchy Waiter, I'm totally with you!

flourchild said...

Haha this is awesome. I'm a waitress and I HATE when people think we get the same minimum wage as everyone else. When people come in that I know don't tip, I be sure to put them at the bottom of my list as far as my concerns go. Especially if they're assholes too. Love your blog!

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