I was happy to get my check yesterday but it was definitely earned. After three days of selling bracelets, earrings, rings, necklaces, broaches, bangles, baubles, beads and cock rings (just kidding on that last one) there are a few new phrases I can do without hearing for a long time:
- Isn't that darling?
- That is precious.
- We are trying to tell a story with the pieces.
- Oh what a soft/bright/strong/bold/interesting/daring color palate that is.
- How does this look on me?
- This looks so good on me.
- Can I get this in two weeks? (It's hand made and takes six months. There are no mythical jewlery elves that come in the night and shit out a $3000 necklace.)
- Gimme that.
- Take this.
- I'm in a hurry.
- I work for "insert name of person I am supposed to know or give a shit about".
- Why is it so expensive? (It's gold, lady. It ain't aluminum and tin foil.)
- Oh, the minimum is $5,000? What if i just want one pieces that is $500? (What do you think, bitch?)
- It's magical. (Yes, someone actually said that.)
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