Get some Bitchy Waiter in your email!

Monday, January 2, 2012

Service Charge for Gay People?

Oh what cost is it to be gay? Not only do the homosexuals of the world suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune they also have to learn to love shopping and decorating and learn to look fierce in skinny jeans. As if that didn't cost enough, now some restaurant in New York City thought it would be cute to put a surcharge on a check for customers being gay. Yes, a server named Theo actually added $0.01 onto a check with the message "you guys r gay." I scoured the Internet to try to figure out where this place was, but the only clue is at the bottom of the check where it says "Surf's up at the ranch." There is no place with the word "ranch" anywhere in the zip code of 10038. I think I know which restaurant it is, but I don't want to say it and then have people go to their website and get Theo fired. I just made that resolution yesterday, so no thanks.

Further examination makes me think that the two customers were not even gay, meaning that Theo was simply calling them gay because he must have the mind of a sixth grader. Why do I think the customers weren't gay? Because they ordered a Steel Reserve which is a beer and not a Cosmopolitan and they shared an order of French Fries. Gay men do not eat carbs; everyone knows that. Maybe Theo was a friend of theirs and he just thought it would be funny, but what if the two customers really were gay? How do you think they felt seeing that on their check? I'll tell you how I would feel. I would feel mother fucking insulted. First off, I am way more gay than one penny's worth. If I was going to be charged for being gay, it better be at least five or ten bucks. (On the pay-for-gay scale Zachary Quinto would pay $4.00, Ricky Martin would pay $8.75, Richard Simmons would be charged $15, Liberace would be charged $25 and Lispy Gay would have to take out a second mortgage on his home and hock his Department 56 Original Snow Village Collection in order to pay his fee. Yeah, Lispy Gay is that gay.)

It isn't the first time we have seen an errant message make it onto a check. A couple of years ago a server in England put on the check "Thank you, little fucker" referring to the bitchy-ass two-year old at the table. Oops. In all honesty, Theo probably did this as a joke to his friends and then his friends took a picture of it and sent it to Facebook and that was it. If it was real, those two customers would have called up the ACLU so quickly that it would have made Paul Lynde rise up from the dead, adjust his ascot and say "Hey, Sammy." But let this be a lesson to us all. If you have gay guys in your station, it is not okay to add a penny to their check. You add it to the credit card tip after they leave. Duh.


Click here to follow The Bitchy Waiter on Twitter.
Click here to find The Bitchy Waiter on Facebook.

20 comments:

janandtheboys said...

Well, Bitchy, I know gay people who eat carbs. I know you are making a joke but yeah they eat carbs you know that! Continue to appreciate you.
oh and btw, for some stupid reason the word "gay" is word used among the young today and I think it may be losing its meaning just like it lost its original meaning of being homosexual. Words change meaning I guess. Out with the old and in with the new? How about some blogging or conversation on this?

janandtheboys said...

edit to say: I meant that the word "gay" has lost its original meaning which was to mean happy... then somehow it came to mean homosexual. IDK

Green Team said...

I believe that the younger generation now uses the term "gay" as a general insult, not limited to homosexuals, but anything/anyone they consider stupid or weird. Maybe that's what he meant?

diatribesandovations.com said...

I think the customer must have known the server or, like you said, we would have heard all about this. Great post! Always fun to read about your escapades!

Dana said...

So I could be off on this, but I would guess that comment may have been meant for the kitchen. Using the open food button to send clever (or in this case, not so clever) jabs at the kitchen has been a thing at a few places I've worked... and this could be the result of not closing off that part of the tab before printing it.

Paressa Tsamis said...

I did that before but i didnt say "gay". It was a customer who bitched about his grey goose cranberry was too weak... when I know it was not (just tryna get drunk on a budget) nd i put in greygoose cranberry "strong for the asshole" and it came up on the bill of course... he didnt say anything but he tipped good so whateves

Mary A. said...

I know you made the resolution, but. . . .this kinda warrants breaking it, don't you think?

I mean, I was gonna clean up my mouth, but that resolution didn't last more than 10 fucking minutes.

I realize "gay" is meant as a general insult. . .so is "fat pig". Not OK either time.

If the server wants to be insulting, he can say asshole, fucker, sunnofabitch or Nancy Pelosi. . .there are much better words than "gay".

Fucker.

Bill Dameron said...

when I first came out, I would be insulted when someone said "Oh, I'm not really surprised". Now when someone says they thought I was gay, I say "thank you, the best of us are"

Nonymous said...

Most probably a message to the kitchen staff, don't you think?

Anonymous said...

A girl down my way got fired after adding a line item of 'Asshole' to some guy - and yeah, he got pissed when it showed up on the check. I forget what she charged. She's back at the job now (I love her), and that guy is probably still an asshole.

I wonder if a 'u guys r gay' ticket gets sent to the bar or kitchen once it's rung in? I agree - a penny is WAY too little.

Nicci

BodyModifiedRose said...

If this is real, i swear that dude is the biggest fuckwit wanker to do such an ignorant thing

Cynthia said...

About 5 years ago I was in a pottery store in Provincetown, RI, looking for a birthday present for my mother. My friend, Kirsten, was with me and my husband was outside waiting for us. I picked out a gift, took it to the register and the woman behind the register asked me if I wanted the Lesbian discount! If I had not had a drink earlier in the day I would have said, "No, I'd like the heterosexual discount!" But, I was so shocked I simply said I was not a Lesbian. Should I have reported the store to the ACLU? I couldn't believe it!

Kait said...

I enjoy the irony that these undercharged gays also enjoyed 2 chick sandwiches.

Josie said...

If he had been smart, he would have DEDUCTED charges from the bill for being gay, given them a coupon to come back and requested that they ask for him next time they come in! I LOVE when gay men sit in my section....they are some of my BEST customers!

BI LIKE ME said...

Bitchy:

$2.00 for liquor? In NYC? for 4 people? I think Theo probably was a friend of the "gay group" and gave them quite the discount.

Their usual gay charge? Probably a more typical $4.00. ;)

busana muslim said...

Thank you for posting this. It’s exactly what I was looking for!

Anonymous said...

Ranch 1
180 Broadway
(between Cortlandt St & Maiden Ln)
New York, NY 10038
Neighborhood: Financial District
(212) 267-1111


There it is. lol

Anonymous said...

it is not Ranch 1
Ranch 1 Does not serve Steel Reserve nor would they have a liquor total on their receipt

Anonymous said...

Cowgirl Seahorse is the place

Anonymous said...

The restaurant's here, I believe. I know this is a year old, but I just came upon it and thought I'd let you know!