Well, I went to Las Vegas this weekend just because I thought it would be fun. So I was there with a friend of mine and we were at a bar. The bartender was totally ignoring us and I really wanted a drink so I told him that I was getting mad and I went off in him. The man next to us, turned to me and said, "You are the meanest most horrible vile person I have ever seen in my entire life. And I want you to be in my movie. So he cast me as a gang member with a bad attitude and he wanted me to cut my hair this way. So I did. Because I'm gonna be in a movie. Me! And I'm not even an actor! Isn't that crazy?It was at this point that we all started to realize that Evy might have a wee case of the pathological liar syndrome. Of course the movie deal fell through. Because it never happened to begin with. Her stories were always big. Like the time she went to a Knicks game and ended up in the VIP seats "just because" or when she was going to go to Paris next week "for the fun of it" but then it didn't happen because something else came up. If she was a Facebook friend, her status would always be like, "OMG, just because I turned down Prince William's proposal now he's gonna marry that skank Kate Middleton" or "I ♥ scratch off lottery tickets. Just one $500! Again."
I don't know whatever happened to Evy. I can''t even remember if she left Houlihan's first or if I did. It was impossible to be her friend because you never knew what her real story was. All I knew to do was listen to her tales and nod enthusiastically so that when I needed something from the bar, she would just make it. Life was simple then. Good luck, Evy, wherever you are. To hear her tell it, she probably had plastic surgery, changed her name and got racial reassignment and is now living in the White House as our first African-American first lady.
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