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Wednesday, April 27, 2011

A Comment on Comments

Forgive me if this post is not about waiting tables, but I must respond to a comment left on this post about Chick-Fil-A. The post was basically about Chick-Fil-A supporting a pro-marriage group that is strictly for heterosexual couples. I understand that they have the right to support whatever they please. My issue is with the dumb ass comment that Anonymous wrote:
Anoymous said... Ithink I'll go there tomorrow & eat.I will be more than happy to go a support a company that stand up for family morals. GOD BLESS THEM!
(I left the poor grammar and lack of space bar intervention to illustrate their point fully.)


Okay. If you are going to go eat at Chick-Fil-A, then by all means do it. But do it because you love their fried chicken patties. Do it because you think their soft serve ice cream tastes like it was squeezed from the teet of an angel. Or do it because their waffle fries make your panties wet. But don't just do it because they "stand up for family morals." Seeing that the original post was about gay marriage, I get the impression, Anonymous, that you think family morals can only happen in a family with a man, woman, 2.5 kids and dog named Rover. Wake up and smell the regular coffee that I told you was decaf because I didn't want to make a whole 'nother pot. For your information, lots of non-traditional families have plenty of family morals. A kid with two dads does not grow up to be a social degenerate any more than a kid who has a mother and a father. I am so fucking sick of stupid ass bitches, cunts and assholes coming down on same sex marriage and my patience is running thin. Here in New York state, it is only a matter of time before gay marriage is legal. Governor Andrew Cuomo has made it a priority. That's right, within a year you may have to hear about two men getting married. That will disgust you more than hearing about a man who left his wife and kids after 15 years of marriage since they are straight and must have the monopoly on family morals. If marriage is so fucking important, I think Anonymous should start a campaign to make it illegal for anyone to get divorced. That way, we can be certain that family morals will be held intact by those who know it best: heterosexual couples. The decline in family morals has nothing to do with gay rights, you know that right? Heterosexual couples have been fucking that shit up for decades. The gays haven't had a chance yet.

Yes, I have been with the same man for twenty goddamn years. In fact, I don't know anyone my age who has been with their husband or wife for longer than that. (Strike that. Shout out to David and Eden!) Believe it or not, we consider ourselves a family. Our little family of three (we have a dog) is just as important as someone who happened to marry someone of the opposite sex and push out some children.

I need to breathe.

Okay, my point is that family morals don't come from one place. They can come from Chick-Fil-A but they can also come from a tiny gay owned business like the The Big Gay Ice Cream Truck. Family morals do not only reside in Christian homes in the the United States. So sure, ask God to bless Chick-Fil-A, but I read the Bible plenty and I am pretty sure that it says that God loves a lot of people. To quote Charles Dickens in A Christmas Carol, "God bless us, everyone!" And to that, I add this: fuck you, bitch.



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60 comments:

J9 said...

I adore you!

dys·func·tion said...

AMEN! This is the most eloquent rant I have heard/read in a looooong time.

I'm loving it, and just out of sheer nosiness...would you and the Mister consider getting wed should it become legal in NYC?

Chunky Mama said...

Well said, Bitchy!!

MarketsNYC said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MarketsNYC said...

So, I was loving this posting, and THEN you got to the Big Gay Ice Cream Truck. Their ice cream is an absolutely essential part of my summers now (even though I have to claw my way through the television cameras that are always crowding around the truck - I think I've been on French TV). Their branding is brilliant. I can't imagine a gay ice cream entrepreneur calling his truck, "Mr. Softee." That just wouldn't do.

Jeremy said...

I have to say that the whole "Family morals" thing bothers me too. I'm gay, and I refuse to hook up; I refuse to be with a guy for any reason other than that I trust him or feel something more than a physical attraction for him. That's a LOT more than I can say for most of the "straight" people on the scene today. And I'm done.

Drea said...

*wipes a tear* sniff, that was beautiful

jlo said...

Congratulations 20 years is a long time even for, especially for, hetrosexual couples. My wife and I have been married almost 17 years.I think what makes a family is love no matter the gender of the couple. LOVE AND HUGS

Sarah Coddington said...

FUCK EVERYONE ELSE who can't accept gay marriage, or a child having two mommies or daddies... Putting someone down because of their sexual orientation is like saying, "Hey you with the physical deformation... Fuck off because you're different (you know, because you REALLY CHOSE to be different)..." Sorry this topic really gets under my skin. As humans we are more than 99% genetically similar to each other... You shouldn't judge others because of who they are, their skin color or their sexual preference... The act of doing so is actually very demoralizing!! It just shows that one is too stupid and close minded too see beyond something that is so superficial... LY bitchy waiter!!!

Bunny said...

Love it and YOU!

Anonymous said...

I understand where you're coming from. I've been with my girlfriend for about 5 years now (we're both 24 so that's a good chunk of our lives) and it's awful thinking about all these stupid loopholes we'd have to jump through to even see each other should we ever become sick enough to need to be hospitalized. Or if I wanted to put her on my insurance from work or file taxes jointly...

It just really isn't fair at all. We do all the things straight couples do. We just don't get any of the rights or protections. Our finances are joined and if she or I were to die today, we'd technically have nothing to leave to each other because insurance is only for spouses or other relatives.

It's kind of a nightmare because of all the "what ifs". The closest thing we can get to 'marriage' at this point is a Domestic Partnership. Which doesn't deserve the capital letters I've given it, really. (We are also in NYC.)

But as long as there is a will to make it work, there will be a way. And hopefully with some time, same-sex couples will be given the same rights as opposite sex couples. I see no logical reason not to. But then nothing is ever done because it's the logical thing to do. Always the 'moral' thing or the 'Christian' thing...

Congratulations to you and your other half for making it so long! Especially without the "ball and chain" of marriage. Ha. How they always joke about it...

Donna Tangye said...

Amen Brother! So happy I live in Vancouver, where same sex marriages are not only legal, but no big deal - just 2 loving people, committed for life.

Sperls13 said...

Bravo!

To me the sanctity of marriage is dead anyways, so who cares. If you love someone and are happy, that is all that really matters.

If more people in this world understood that (I'm looking @ you teabaggers), the world would be a far better place.

As always, thanks for the rant.
Peace.

Chio said...

You're absolutely right. Families come in all different shapes and sizes, regardless of sexual orientation. Some people just don't seem to get that we're all human beings and should all share the same rights. I'm bisexual and my life was made HELL through high school by people with the same mentality as your anonymous hater.

And congrats on the twenty years! I've only been married for two years and hope we have a loving relationship for that long :D

Lolamouse said...

First off, congrats on 20 years! My husband and I just celebrated 18, and I know what you mean about it being a rare thing. Second, I totally agree about the morality issue. How moral is it when a spouse cheats? Lies? Gets divorced and marries someone who could be his daughter or granddaughter? Doesn't pay child support? Third, morality aside, marriage confers certain legal rights, and it is unacceptable to deny anyone legal rights based on his or her sexual preference. Though I do miss the waffle fries and those sandwiches with pickles, I won't support the company. Luv ya.

Gallo said...

AMEN!

Anonymous said...

Hey, I am straight and married since 1987. I don't care what your preference is, if you are with someone and want to get married, then go a head. A gay couple isn't going to ruin the world because they are married. People should worry more about what they are doing and leave everybody else alone.

Jes said...

BW, you put this *so well*. I've read and written a lot of arguments for same sex marriage, and yours was well-written, reasonable and certainly the funniest. It's always hard for me to keep from becoming super nasty about my retorts to the closed-minded attitudes of those that are against gay marriage- but you managed to keep that shit in check and deliver something funny AND logical. bravo!

Jenna and Trevor said...

I wonder if anonymous goes to my former church. The one where not one, but TWO of their pastors were involved in extramarital affairs with the young women they, uh..."counseled".

That's family morals for you.

Jenny said...

"If marriage is so fucking important, I think Anonymous should start a campaign to make it illegal for anyone to get divorced." Can I just say- AMEN! Super religious/conservative people run around saying gay marriage destroys the sanctity of marriage... Um, but getting divorced is okay? Great post!

zena said...

This is why I don't attend church. Doesn't it say that the only judge of others is God? From my fb profile:

"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ."-Mohandas Ghandi

Becky said...

Zena....love that quote! I am a very committed Christian...and it always pains me to hear what some non believers think about all Christians b/c of the awful judgmental behavior they've experience at the hands of one. I try to make them understand that's not God...that's stupid human behavior...God is about love...and God doesn't love gay people any less then he does straight people. My cousin was really ostracized by his fellow christians when he came out...which made me so angry....I have to remind him that no matter what people say, all that matters is how God feels about him, not judgmental jerks!

Krissy said...

There's so much passion in this post. I love how you poured your heart out. Love is love. That's just how I see it.

I'm going to tag you in a picture I have on Facebook. I think you'd appreciate it more than I do. It's just sitting in my album collecting dust.

Practical Parsimony said...

Jeremy,those are the right reasons to be with someone.

BW,Christians, under the cover of Christianity, promote divorce, sodomy, adultery, child abuse, and sexual abuse of minors.

I am a once-upon-a-time, long ago, Christian and a committed heterosexual. However, I have never once disapproved of homosexuality. As a minister's wife,I shocked people when I defended gays. They shocked me with their attitudes, especially when I discovered their affairs.

Exactly why is anyone interested in who a adult has sex with?

I have more respect for your stance than I do the Christians who are on their third and fourth divorce and who have committed grievous wrongs against their former spouses and children.

Good post.

Practical Parsimony said...

Aaah, I meant that I still am a committed heterosexual.

Toni said...

AMEN! Love this!

Mary A. said...

yeah, but do they put toys in their kid's meals? 'Cause that is the true evil in this world. Fat people. Fat gay people.

Sing it Sista!

Ninja Kitty Extraordinaire said...

*Standing Ovation*, Sugar! Incidentally, there was a brilliantly well written response (the full-length version would junk up the space I'm already taking reckless advantage of) for all those "god-fearing" chicken lovers (excerpt: I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?) - if only their pitiful minds were 1/100th as open as their poultry-devouring mouths, no? Bravo & congrats on having the relationship many of us will search multiple lifetimes for! XOXO

Krissy said...

Mary A., there's a time and place for everything and this is not the time to joke. Don't know if you noticed, but we're all serious here.

Think before you act.

Eden Folwell said...

Thanks for the shout out! I can't wait for you to get married so I can buy you a crazy kitchen gadget from Crate & Barrel that you didn't know you needed or wanted until they let you register for it.

Katie P said...

"Heterosexual couples have been fucking that shit up for decades."
Has to be the best line I've seen in a long effing time. I'm sure the husband and wife I saw at Wal-Mart pulling on their kids hair and telling them "i will eff you up in front of all these people" have lots of high high morals and their kids will be definite upstanding citizens.

Haruka said...

Way to go, Bitchy! I'm a woman who has been with my wife since 1992 and we were legally married (here in Canada, because my country rocks) in 2009.

lee said...

i had a burst of brilliance. i will make sandwiches from dog excrement and a pickle slice. i will draw a cross on the bag and close the establishment on sundays. your cashier will say the grace while she rings up your order. both parents must be present if a kid's meal is ordered. this means i will have a line of vans full of christian fundies, ready to spend their daddy-earned money on poop sandwiches and ice waters, so they can look holy while they eat their fast food. yeah for me!

Icechild13 said...

I am a 16 yr old who's parents just split up because of my mom's attraction to females and i have been living with her and her Girlfriend for a bit now. I understand what your saying, it bugs me that people discriminate against me because of my mom's choice let alone discriminate against her because she chose that life style, family isn't about who all is in the small group of people you are in a household with, it matters about the love shared, and it bugs me when people protest against the true meaning of love. Even people who aren't religious go against same sex relationships, I myself am proud to say I do not care the gender my feelings stay the same no matter what. Thank you BW for sharing your thoughts and making me feel better knowing that I'm not surrounded on this god forsaken homophobe island here in Alaska.

By the way nice to hear twenty years strong x3 grats

Aunty Pol said...

I love your post Bitchy. There are a lot of +20's out there by the way . SU ( hubby # 2 ) and I have been together for 23 years ..it's been challenging and we work at it daily but it can be done..vodka helps too..lol.

We have Chik Fil-A down here too in the Bible Belt and I agree with your stand on this. So does my husband .


Same sex marriage is not only about the idea of marriage itself...it is also about equal protection under the law...period.

Until we ALL have equal protection under the law, then no one has it at all.

Waving madly from Houston.

Aunty Pol

Anonymous said...

"Sancitiy of marriage" - screw that. Some people need to grow up and realise families come in all shapes and sizes these days. I'm straight, but my family is still considered weird. I live with my partner (who is 20 years older than me) and his two small children and our family works fine. Two of my best friends are lesbians and have been in a committed relationship for ten years. They have four kids between them and are some of the best mothers I know. I also know numerous single parents. All of these don't quite fit the "traditional family" model, but I can't say it seems a problem in any of these cases. You don't need to be married to have a family, or to make a relationship work, and you shouldn't have to be of opposite genders to get married.

If you love someone and they love you back, you're lucky. Who cares about the plumbing.

stream27 said...

Way to friggen' go. This is one of the best blog posts I've read anywhere. Totally agree with everything you said, though I'm not homosexual. Personally, I know way more homosexual couples that have their shit together than "traditional" heterosexual couples. Best of luck to you and your man! And if NY continues to be prejudice and nasty, you can always come and live up here in Canada! xox

Miranda said...

'nuff said.

dirtydisher said...

I am sick of idiots who preach morals to anyone. I'm glad I live in a state where same sex marriage is legal.

January said...

I LOVE YOU BITCHY! Move to Canada!

Beth said...

Oh Hell to the YES Big Gay Ice Cream!

And Hell to the YES people lovin'! I'm straight, & I have no family values. So there.

The Empress said...

You definitely earned your bitch card with this rant BW. Well said! As for the comment made by that anonymous douche canoe, perhaps if they spent less time worrying about what goes on between two loving and consenting adults AND more time say reading the bible, then maybe just maybe they would learn not to judge.

Katharine said...

You are a wonderful, incredible person. Your response to this person is classy, well-written and makes the perfect point. Congratulations on your 20 years; you're an inspiration to everyone, gay or straight.

I love reading your blog just for insights like this.

Tonya said...

AMAZING rant! You blew that ignorant moral values-sucking fucker right out of the water!!! Eloquent and lovely.

Tonya said...

"Krissy said...

Mary A., there's a time and place for everything and this is not the time to joke. Don't know if you noticed, but we're all serious here.

Think before you act."

Krissy, you're not the Bitchy Waiter police. Mary A is a longtime poster and what she said was fine. Unwind your panties.

Krissy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ela said...

WORD

Mary A. said...

Love you Tonya!

I also love BW !

Tonya said...

Love you too, Mary. Now can I get that Happy Meal you promised me?

Jessica B said...

BW, you are awesome.

Krissy said...

Lol! Tonya, you're so funny. I can say whatever the fuck I want. Last time I checked, you weren't the Bitchy Waiter police either. So shut the fuck up.

If you were paying close attention you would've also read, "There's so much passion in this post. I love how you poured your heart out. Love is love. That's just how I see it."

Quite frankly, I don't give a damn how long Mary A. has been posting. I have just as much right to say whatever I want as she does. The point I was making was that her statement was inappropriate. So mind ya business.

Anyhoo, I'm not going to continue with responding to you nor anyone else. This post was about Mr. Bitchy. You, my dear, are irrealavent.

Ps. My panties are positioned just fine. Thanks for your concern.

Noelle said...

Well said Bitchy!
Chick-fil-a is a bigoted and stupid company. If I were CEO that place would be open 7 day a week they are missing a lot of revenue being closed on Sunday. You can worship before lunch get your ass to work. Then I wouldn't have to take a day off from boycotting the idiots.

Tonya said...

Krissy, there's a time and place for everything and this is not the time to be a judgmental bitch. Don't know if you noticed, but we're all talking about the Big Gay ice cream truck here.

Think before you act.

Krissy said...

:) Tonya, you're so cute when you're mad

Tonya said...

I see you're now sticking with insults you can spell. Wise choice.

Angie said...

BOOM!

Goodnight, Krissy :)

Ms.C said...

Great point... "If marriage is so fucking important, I think Anonymous should start a campaign to make it illegal for anyone to get divorced." Love it!

Trix said...

Yay! What you said!!! xoxoxoxoxoxo

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