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Monday, June 6, 2011

A Comment on Comments

Time for a comment on comments, but unlike most of the time, I am not going to bash what some anonymous reader had to say. Instead, I will agree with them. In regards to this post about leaving an errant drink on someone else's check so I would not have to pay for it or admit my fuck up to my manager, I was blasted for my poor decision. And rightfully so.

Anonymous said: Clean up your act and don't commit a crime just to avoid embarrassment.
Shame on you! Putting false charges on a bill is a crime!

Another Anonymous said: Seriously, I've been waiting tables for years, and I would never do that, not even if it's a douche who deserves it. You agree that it was unethical and wrong, but did it anyway.

Only Hostess said: You can't expect guests to provide respect if you act in a disrespect-able fashion.

Historically Crazy said: There were better ways to solve the problem, and lying is almost never the solution.

Disappointed said: You dishonored yourself terribly with your behavior last night. Throughout our lives we may gain and lose possessions, friends and loved ones but the thing we carry with us to the end is our character. It's the one thing no one can ever take from us. It saddens me to see someone throw theirs away.

In my moment of ethical dilemma, I took the easy road. I justified it by thinking about how many times I have had to cover the cost of a customer's mistake; like the time someone left thirty dollars instead of forty or when they took the credit card voucher with them and I didn't get a tip. It was easy justification, but it didn't make it right. I was wrong. The post will remain since I have never removed anything once I put it out there. I realize I lost a lot of respect with that post and I can accept that. My apologies and hopefully I can earn your respect again. I will take the advice of Adam who said:

Just think about the universe as a whole and repay your Irish Coffee debt in some unexpected way.

I will keep an eye out for that man and if he comes in again, I will make sure that something is removed from his check and I will pay for it myself. In the meantime, rest assured I will be on my best behavior and when I see an opportunity to pay back the universe, I will do it. This is me eating crow:

32 comments:

TwystiidTrixxi said...

I'm proud of you Bitchy. It's not easy putting your life in the public spotlight as you do because, no matter what, you can't please everyone. You just proved that you're human, just as I've suspected all this time... ;)

Vicki said...

It was wrong what you did, but it takes a big man to admit that he's wrong. Just with that one little admission from you, you've earned my respect back. =) We've all done things that we've regretted that can't be undone and anyone who says differently are not being truthful.

Ela said...

This is nice :)

Kalei's Best Friend said...

Have u ever wondered why the 'anonymous' comments are anonymous? i can understand why u did what u did.. The fact is, I am guessing this is the one and only time? If so, you admit your wrongdoing... You know what? You owed up to it.. Its water under the bridge... I think this post benefits wait-staff and customer...

Adam Hawthorne said...

As always, I applaud your maturity, because some of the comments on the original post were unnecessarily harsh.
I don't feel that people had to condemn you the way that they did in such a nasty judgemental way... ...a simple I don't approve of your actions would really have been more than adequate.
Also find it hilarious that everyone seems to have forgotten just last week when you stood up for that nice hostess and all of the other things that you do.
It's not like EVERY week finds you claiming to have done some horrible thing, this was an isolated incident in which no one got hurt, so frankly I don't see why it was treated like such a big deal.

Personally, I feel that this situation was contributed to greatly by your manager's stance on his business... ...obviously the way that your boss treats mistakes is a pretty big motivating factor in decisions that one would make at work.

zelbess said...

Bitchy, I never thought badly of you for that post to begin with! :) I know you're a great person, and no one is perfect. I'm a waitress myself (a Hooters Girl, actually!), and stuff like that happens all the time. I don't personally do it, but I'm lucky that I have very understanding managers. When you're not in that fortunate situation, it's a rather sticky scenario!

I think people went way overboard with their judgments, assaulting your "character" over something so small! Like they have never lied before? Please! You're a great person, and we all do bad things sometimes. Don't worry about it!

Derby Wallus said...

I completely agree with Adam on this. Everyone fucks up, so why do we need to tear apart other people when they do? I'm sure that every single one of those people who commented on your last post have done something unethical in their lives as well.
I admire you Bitchy. Keep doing what you're doing, rock out, and don't let anyone bring you down!

watergirl said...

And the respect-o-meter just shot up significantly. It takes a helluva person to admit, even to themselves, the error they made. You did it publicly. That says a good bit about you.

I admit that the previous post made me sad but you have restored the faith and respect I've always had for you.

:huggles:
~watergirl~

Marsha66 said...

I think I remember reading some where about "casting the first stone". You said in your post it was wrong sometimes humans do the wrong thing, I think it's because we're human, I could be wrong but I've never known a perfect one. Now you've admitted twice semi-publicly your wrong and also apologize. It takes a big person to admit when their wrong. Anybody else says anything negative I think you can just tell them to shove it!

Practical Parsimony said...

Personally, I lose respect for readers who cannot disagree without signing as anonymous. If a person has a problem, a point to make, or is right, then sign your own name to it. I was horrified, but did not feel like a judgmental reply. You only did one thing: you made me more careful with the charges listed on a receipt.If I had said anything, it would have been, "Shame on you. I expected better."

ChiTown Girl said...

I totally agree with Adam's comment, and many of the others, as well. If nothing else, you are always honest with us, Bitchy, and I admire that in a person.

Nightgaunt said...

I confess I was dissapointed when I read your last post, it didn't sound like the same noble soul who stood up in the face of Dickhead and his Q-tip girlfriend. (And also reminded me why I do check the bill)

But I also have to agree, it takes a big person to admit, especially publicly and in front of the crowd of Anon's, that you made a mistake.

I also hear Crow might be improved by a good vinegar bbq. ;)

Haruka said...

Good for you, Bitchy. :)

And So She Said... said...

BW,

you know I'm no bible thumper but I was sippin on my red wine and thought of this to all those people who had some very strong reactions:

"Judge Not Lest Ye Be Judged
and
Let He Who is Without Sin Cast the First Stone"

I love you and can understand your situation that evening.
People do shit... things they are not proud of... and life goes on.
YOU had the cojones to admit to the world what happened and even gave advice of how NOT to let it happen.
So, you know, whatever. you will pay the universe back anyway you can.

OnlyHostess said...

Thanks, Bitchy.

I love advocating for us. I'm glad you can help me believe I still am doing the right thing =)

I'll always read - I know you'll fix your mistake, as you've fixed others (that weren't even your fault) in the past. And all we still deserve what comes =)

Anonymous said...

When I write a comment as anonymous, it's bc I'm too lazy to come up with a clever screen name :) I mean, it's not like you can see me either way, right? lol, at any rate, as one of the anonymous posts from yesterday, I am glad to see this one. None of us are perfect, but the good ones are those who can admit that they're wrong and learn from it :)

sally said...

Oh don't worry about it! I think all the holier-than-thou people chastising you are just being silly.
(Maybe the irish coffee dude used to be a waiter and he truly would not mind helping you out.)
If you gave great service a six dollar overcharge is not going to freak out a normal person. And it's nothing to lose sleep over. I say to all the people condemning you: "get a life!"

Anonymous said...

Hey, we all take the easy out sometimes... you're no better or worse than the rest of us.

If I was never going to forgive you for something, it would be for calling Deborah Van Valkenburgh a has-been. She was in The Warriors with that dude who was in Xanadu!!! And don't even get me started on Streets Of Fire. That's immortality right there.

TFlats Ghost said...

I am really proud of you too! I'm sure you'll have no problem cutting me a check for $50k a year for taking my job away to promote your narcissistic little blog. That should really help level out your karma, which is of such great importance to you. There's no reason you should lose any respect from your thousands of fans just because you got someone fired because your an old tired queen who can't stand being in a room full of young people having fun on YOUR birthday. Thanks Bitchy, you really are the bestest. So proud of you for standing up and taking responsibility for your actions. I'm sure when you go ass over teacup someday because some other loser caught you drinking a mimosa before noon at work you'll understand why and be at peace with the universe.

The Bitchy Waiter said...

"because your an old tired queen"

I think you meant "because you're a tired old queen."

vicki said...

your sooo right, i did mean that. hahahahahaha

watergirl said...

hahahaha, thats so funny. Luvs me some bitchy-ness

TFlats Ghost said...

LULZ, FTW!!!!!

watergirl said...

With regards to:
watergirl said...
hahahaha, thats so funny. Luvs me some bitchy-ness
June 12, 2011 1:23 PM

That isn't actually me. Or anyone I know. I was at a family reunion at the time of the posting.

While I agree with the poster and adore you, I'd like to ask the poster to please use their own nick.

~watergirl~

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