Saturday, June 25, 2011

The Bitchy Waiter Can Now be a Bitchy Bridegroom

Same-sex marriage has become legal in New York State, making it the most populous state in the country to come to its fucking senses about love and marriage. Earlier this year, I wrote a post about "gay" marriage. Six months later, it's a reality. I truly believe that in ten years from now, most people will be saying "Yeah, what the fuck was the big deal, anyway?" Allow me to repost what I wrote in January because even though it was only six months ago, it is a world away. If and when I get married, we will be registering at this place.

From January 5, 2011:

Forgive me if this post is not about waiting tables, but I must respond to a comment left on this post about Chick-Fil-A. The post was basically about Chick-Fil-A supporting a pro-marriage group that is strictly for heterosexual couples. I understand that they have the right to support whatever they please. My issue is with the dumb ass comment that Anonymous wrote:
Anoymous said... Ithink I'll go there tomorrow & eat.I will be more than happy to go a support a company that stand up for family morals. GOD BLESS THEM!
(I left the poor grammar and lack of space bar intervention to illustrate their point fully.)


Okay. If you are going to go eat at Chick-Fil-A, then by all means do it. But do it because you love their fried chicken patties. Do it because you think their soft serve ice cream tastes like it was squeezed from the teet of an angel. Or do it because their waffle fries make your panties wet. But don't just do it because they "stand up for family morals." Seeing that the original post was about gay marriage, I get the impression, Anonymous, that you think family morals can only happen in a family with a man, woman, 2.5 kids and dog named Rover. Wake up and smell the regular coffee that I told you was decaf because I didn't want to make a whole 'nother pot. For your information, lots of non-traditional families have plenty of family morals. A kid with two dads does not grow up to be a social degenerate any more than a kid who has a mother and a father. I am so fucking sick of stupid ass bitches, cunts and assholes coming down on same sex marriage and my patience is running thin. Here in New York state, it is only a matter of time before gay marriage is legal. Governor Andrew Cuomo has made it a priority. That's right, within a year you may have to hear about two men getting married. That will disgust you more than hearing about a man who left his wife and kids after 15 years of marriage since they are straight and must have the monopoly on family morals. If marriage is so fucking important, I think Anonymous should start a campaign to make it illegal for anyone to get divorced. That way, we can be certain that family morals will be held intact by those who know it best: heterosexual couples. The decline in family morals has nothing to do with gay rights, you know that right? Heterosexual couples have been fucking that shit up for decades. The gays haven't had a chance yet.

Yes, I have been with the same man for twenty goddamn years. In fact, I don't know anyone my age who has been with their husband or wife for longer than that. (Strike that. Shout out to David and Eden!) Believe it or not, we consider ourselves a family. Our little family of three (we have a dog) is just as important as someone who happened to marry someone of the opposite sex and push out some children.

I need to breathe.

Okay, my point is that family morals don't come from one place. They can come from Chick-Fil-A but they can also come from a tiny gay owned business like the The Big Gay Ice Cream Truck. Family morals do not only reside in Christian homes in the the United States. So sure, ask God to bless Chick-Fil-A, but I read the Bible plenty and I am pretty sure that it says that God loves a lot of people. To quote Charles Dickens in A Christmas Carol, "God bless us, everyone!" And to that, I add this: fuck you, bitch.



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33 comments:

Clear thinking said...

I was about to msg you and tell you congrats and then this post magically came into my news feed lol... Congrats and good luck!

Anonymous said...

Couldn't be happier. Love is love and in a world filled with heterosexual divorce I don't understand anyone standing in the way of two people who love each other wanting to commit to one another. So beyond my grasp. It isn't a big deal at all. CONGRATULATIONS! If/when you decide to get married to your man I know it will be a beautiful day. Thrilled that people are finally realizing this should have been done long ago.

Freedom said...

I have many gay friends. A few in long term relationships. I was working with one of my gay friends yesterday and we were working when he ran screaming through the store that New York legalized gay marriage. I'm so happy for him and many other in the world who can go to New York and get legally married. I don't see why people can't get married based on their gender coupling. Some people say God prevents it and all that stuff but what I want to ask is are you God? Who are you to say that? Just because it was in the Bible doesn't mean for certain that it's legit. Bibles are published by companies who could alter it if they want to. I'm happy that New York is one of the states that have allowed this wonderful opportunity for gays. All for it. Best of luck to every marriage :)

Anonymous said...

To the Anonymous poster above me:

Who is forcing you to watch? Were you invited to their house to view them having sex? Were you tied to a chair and then forced to watch gay porn or something? Of course not. I've never seen gay people having sex in public.. I've never seen them flaunting their relationships any more in public than I've seen straight people do. Why should there be a double standard? How are they hurting you?

What if I was to say that I think it's gross (or 'grose' for all those who can't spell that are following along) when fat people wear clothes that are eight sizes too small for their figures and there are rolls spilling out in places that NOBODY wants to see. But, guess what -- That's THEIR RIGHT to dress that way, whether I agree with it or not. It's their body. It's their life.. And I need to mind my own damn business because, in the end, it affects me very little. Who are they really hurting? No one.

Whether you agree with gay marriage or not (based off religion or whatever), gay people have every right to be married based off the constitutional rights they share with every straight person on the planet. They're no different. Do you think black people still shouldn't have the same rights as white people, too? Because, for a long time, black people were denied the same rights as white people.. And now we (as a nation) look back and realize we were all being stupid. How is this really any different than that? They were denied the basic rights that white people took for granted. And, now, gays are being denied the basic rights that straight people take for granted. (And a lot of them do! How many marriages end in divorce now? It would seem to me that straight people are messing up the values and sanctity of marriage well enough on their own, how much more can adding the gay people to the fray really hurt things? Seriously.)

At some point there is a line as to where the whole thing of "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" does end, and that's when it entails hurting others. Are the gays getting married really hurting you? Is it really DIRECTLY impacting your life in such a negative way? Chances are your answer would be a very grudging "no". You probably won't even really think about it on a daily basis.. It's not going to leave you sleepless at night or give you ulcers from being stressed out.. But gay people have to live with the pain that being segregated causes every single day. Every time they look at someone they love. Every time they're picked on, made fun of, or singled out by people who like to point fingers from their 'holier-than-thou" platforms.

People seriously need to lighten up. With all the hate in the world, isn't it nice to know that love still has the chance to conquer all?

I'm posting this as anonymous because I don't have a blogger account, but I'm brave enough to sign my name to this. I imagine there will be a fair few haters (such as above) who will hide behind anonymity and continue to spout off, fearful of any true repercussions, but I won't be one of them --

My name is Jennie. I'm a straight married woman who comes from a general Christian upbringing.. And I approve this message.

Ghadeer said...

I thought of you as soon as I read this piece of news!

Freedom said...

Jennie, I agree with all you wrote and I'm proud of you for taking a stand. It's people like you who make me feel proud to live in this country.

Anonymous said...

You've got to remember that the founder of Chic-Fil-A is "over the top" religious. NO Chic-Fil-A is allowed to open for business on a Sunday. In this day & age that is REALLY Extreme.

Having said that, you can see why their comments are anti-everything that doesn't conform to their beliefs. And with the assholes in the Tea Party and mainstream GOP campaigning against same sex marriage, they are driving conservatives into a frenzy. No matter what you do, you will always have these people make negative comments against you. There will always be hate. Hopefully it will shrink more and more! Congratulations everyone in New York. Everyone deserves to be happy!!

The Bipolar Diva said...

what Jennie said!

lapetitefée said...

Second and third Anonymous kind of rock - first Anonymous, you do not... you also are obviously one of the following:

- a teenager who had a less than thorough spelling and grammar education thus far

- a completely ignorant individual who can't read, so can't spell

- a combo of the first and second things above?


Yes, I realize my answer is very cruel, AND JUST AS BAD AS YOUR COMMENT WAS; but congrats to NY and their decision.

Practical Parsimony said...

Blacks were denied basic human rights by people quoting the Bible. I can give you the book, chapter, and verses, actually, verses in various books of the Bible. Anything that some Christians want to foist onto others has a Bible verse somewhere to back it up.

As for same sex relationships of any kind, before the mid 20th century, these relationships were not a problem for anyone and were deemed "romantic friendships" Look it up. Many politicians, writers, and other famous people were involved in "romantic friendships" with the world not even raising an eyebrow or suggesting lives should be lived in another manner.

By the way, my being divorced for thirty years and not remarrying is looked upon as deviant behavior here in the rural South.

Even as a committed heterosexual, some still think I might be a lesbian (yeah, that is why I date men) and others think I should "settle down" and get married AGAIN.

ChiTown Girl said...

I thought of you as soon as I heard this news. Congrats to you and everyone else who will be effected by this.

Anon #1 - you are an assbag. oh, and you're grose, too. I mean - your grose to.

My name WAS Female, I shit you not! said...

I'm a 74 year old female heterosexual from MA and I say
" about time New York.
Way to go! "

Lolamouse said...

As soon as I heard, I shouted, "Now BW can get married!" My mother in law looked at me even more sour faced than usual. I'm so happy. Come on, Maryland-get moving! And My Name WAS Female, ISYN, Lolamouse sez hi and you rock!

Vicki said...

=) I think it's great that New York is finally stepping up to the plate and allowing gay marriage. Gay people deserve the same right to be miserable with the same partner for year after year just like the heterosexuals--LOL. Seriously I think it's great and I'll be happy for you when you decide to bite the bullet with your sweetheart. =)

Anon 3:10-You're obviously an idiot who needs to grow up.

Witchybaiter--You had me LOL--I love it. =D

NotAnonymous said...

Congrats to you and your SO. Now your (real or fictional) demonspawn (a loving term) can now have married parents. Ponderous question though, are you both Dad/Daddy. Or are you BitchDad and BeardDad? Yes, I am assuming your SO has a beard. Why wouldn't they?

Linn said...

I know more gay couples who have been together for 20 years plus than I do married heterosexual that have been married for 10. Congrats BW.

Adam Hawthorne said...

I remember several years ago, right before Massachusetts legalized gay marriage, in a lot of the debates people were saying "you have civil unions, it's the same thing. It's all the rights, we just don't want you to use the word marriage."
As I heard that more I realized that a lot more people than I ever though really were not opposed to gay marriage, but the hang-up on the word seemed to allow them to do what they felt was morally right (extending equality to all people) while still being respectful to the biggest roadblock hindering the ability of evolution: the religion.

I tend to view it as the equivilent of something a child would do, like putting their finger an inch from their sibling's eye and saying "I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you!" By giving homosexuals the same rights (in the form of a civil union) as everyone else but still adhereing to the believe that because it's not called a marriage it's okay, it seemed to satisfy them.
I honestly believe that the mentality of people is ninety-percent there, and though the remaining ten percent is that irrational foundation of uncompromising basic religious education that we grew up with and are bound to (in name only, since it's not enough to get people to church every week) I have faith that it won't continue to be enough to keep people from doing what they feel in their hearts is right.
Especially with modern religion evolving the way that it is, I feel that people are deciding that God's love extends to all of his children, and not just the babymaking-est ones.

I personally had never really cared about the issue, but after I married my husband and I came to experience first-hand the validation that comes with it, I finally understood that having all the rights of a marriage under a different name is a gift of good intentions, but the greatest gift is from people who are willing and courageous enough to actually share the use of the word 'marriage.'

Lastly, my personal gratitude goes out to the people who have expressed their support of equal rights through the comments that they've left.

watergirl said...

FINALLY! It's about damned time.

Love comes in every size, shape, color, gender and belief. Hopefully, the rest of the states will get their heads out of their collective asses soon.

:huggles:
~watergirl~

Anonymous said...

Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee get married!!! I have never met you but reading your blog feels like in some small way, that I know you. I just think it would be awesome if you actually got hitched with your partner and you could write the most awesome blog post about it.

Anonymous said...

Yay! I'm so happy for you :) and I am with Jennie on this 100%. Congrats to everyone, screw the ignorant haters- their own bitter anger will get them in the long run. Now let's get the rest of the states on board!

<3 Serenity

Doug Chance said...

@Anonymous: What's the toll for the bridge?

But let's suspend our disbelief (using 25lb test mono-filament). Back when I was an ignorant teen-aged boy I too thought it was grose to see two guys getting it on. (Sapphic ladies have always had my approval.) But now, I say bring it on.We all live in a yellow submarine, if you know what I mean.

Oh wait. This post was about marriage, so forget about passionate sex. BW, let me know the date asap so I can start setting aside money for that 420hp / 5 gallon margarita blender.

Maria said...

I'm so glad that ignorant people show themselves immediately with their lack of ability to spell, punctuate, or capitalize. It makes skipping thier moronic posts SO much easier!

But this is about gay marriage, which should have been legal long ago. YAY!!!

Rachel said...

The link to where you are registered takes me to www.winsupply.com. Did anyone ask about this yet? Everything else seems covered.

So happy for NY! <3 you BW

The Bitchy Waiter said...

@Rachel: Win is a restaurant supply store. I need a new apron.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
witchybaiter said...

What the....

Kiddoc said...

Congratulations!!! You and your partner were the first people I thought of when I read about the law passing. I couldn't be happier for you! (Now send Gov. Cuomo to Michigan. We need to pass that law here.)

Kyle French said...

Gay marriage was legalized on my eighteenth birthday. Living life beneath the rainbow was never so sweet.

Mannix said...

You probably hear this all the time but you need your own talk show! Seriously! I would be a loyal follower of such a program on television. Moreover, I think if you had your own show, gay marriage would've been legal ages ago!

Haruka said...

As a woman who was finally able to marry her wife here in Canada a couple of years ago, I say congratulations NY on a sensible decision. :)

Dirty Disher said...

My kid has two dads. Two legally married dads. And she turned out great.

Jasmine said...

Congratulations! I'm so happy for you, and for the state of New York. The issue of same sex marriage will one day be something of the past, maybe not in our lifetime, but one day. It will be in history books and the kids at school will be like, "THAT used to be an issue?"

On behalf of NY making marriage equal for all, I created this Squidoo lens featuring some beautiful wedding invitations. :)
http://www.squidoo.com/Gay-Wedding-Invitations

Kara Hoag said...

That really is awesome. I am glad to hear that yet another place has come to their goddamn senses. Congrats to you and new york!