Friday, October 8, 2010

A Comment on Comments

And now for a comment on comments. I suspect that the person who wrote this particular comment had the hope that I would respond in this way. They were right.

I am not a grammar Nazi said...

This post was really hard to read. First off, "piÑata" is not "piŃata," as someone from Texas would surely know. "PiNata" would also be acceptable in the United States, but if you are going to take the time to be international, do it correctly so those of us learned in Spanish are not confused by your meager attempts.

My second area of confusion came from the following line: "Now I guess it all depends on if the servers are allowed to carry guns to." Big no-no there, sir. Never EVER end a sentence with a preposition, such as "to." I'm sure you probably forgot your fifth grade teacher's bickering between massacring innocent critters and standing on your soap box. So let me remind you that this error can easily be fixed by changing your propositional "to" to the adverbial "too," which not only removes the problem of an objectless prposition, but also clarifies the sentence by giving it the meaning you intended.

Please, in the future, sir, remember that not all of your readers are as learned as I am and may become confused by your mistakes. Take the time to review your English before writing a blog. Maybe stick to waiting tables. I'd leave the acting out, too. "Too" with two "o's."



Dear Not a Grammar Nazi,

I have fixed the errors that you so kindly brought to my attention. Yes, I "too" hate when someone mixes up too, to, and two. I also hate the confusion that happens between there, their and they're. Another grammar mistake that bothers me is the differentiation between your and you're.

As for my piñata mistake, my Mexican relatives are spinning in their graves. I am ashamed. The four semesters of Spanish that I took obviously did not sink in and the fact that I am half-Hispanic seems to hold no agua. I should be beaten with an old stale tamale.

If "you're" looking for a perfectly written piece of writing, perhaps you should be looking in places other than a blog. Maybe The New York Times or an encyclopedia will satisfy you.

Also, you should know that me giving up acting because some random blog reader who has a red corrective pencil stuck up "their" ass tells me "to" is not a good enough reason. But thank you.

Love,
The Bitchy Waiter

24 comments:

Jon Hanson said...

Please oh please tell me that was not an anonymous comment the Grammar Nazi left. Because we should all spend our weekend spamming him/her with misssspelings, pour grammer, dengling particpals with all our sentenced ending in a preposition.. to.

What a jagoff. Good response.

SD
http://simpledudecomplexworld.blogspot.com/

Mark W said...

"PiNata" would also be acceptable in the United States, but if you are going to take the time to be international, do it correctly so those of us learned in Spanish are not confused by your meager attempts.

Damn. See, I am NOT learned in Spanish, yet I was able to tell that pinata was pinata, with or without the appropriate effeminate squiggly line over it.

It seems that someone so well learned in English would have been able to tell what you mean, just by the spelling alone, with or without the sperm line over the top of the N.

I think Not A Grammar Nazi needs to suck your balls.

FPGIRL said...

*stands applauding*

Anonymous said...

Dear Bitchy:
I love you for this. I will marry you and have your babies. Thank you.

zker said...

hahaha!awesome response.

Mary A. said...

I think Mark W is the coolest EVAH!

Pienso que "NAGN" es una puta.

That's probably not correct Spansih. Feel free to correct me, dickhead.

As far as ending sentances in a preposition. To quote my favorite joke: "Ah'm sorry! Where y'all from, Bitch?"

Fickle Cattle said...

I've read a few articles which have said that ending a sentence with a preposition is sometimes the correct thing to do. The rule is not set in stone. Here are links:

http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/ending-prepositions.aspx

http://www.yourdictionary.com/grammar-rules/Ending-a-Sentence-with-a-Preposition.html

Also, the guy or girl is probably just goading you. Nice response, but it was probably what he wanted you to do. His "you should stop acting comment" was just nasty and showed a high degree of pettiness.

I am Fickle Cattle.

Karyna said...

"I am not a grammar Nazi" should start reading people's text messages and status updates on Facebook - grmr, missspeled, OMG.

Keep on writing!

Toni said...

What a douche!

Good response, though.

SkippyMom said...

Who was your "to" propositioning? Oh....he meant prepositional? And nice spelling mistake a few words later.

I think Not A Grammar Nazi is fitting because he/she sucks at it. LOL.

If the shoe fits buddy.

Food Train said...

I hope he never reads my blog, I think we should try but I don't claim to be a grammar expert, I am just trying to have fun and share some ideas.

EMOsborn said...

Am I the only one who noticed that the grammar Nazi misspelled "proposition" at the end of his second paragraph?

Sharlene T. said...

Some people can't open their mouths without putting someone else down... They reveal more about themselves than the one they're attacking... You're cool... Let the Nazi slink away...

tina said...

Great post!! :)

Kim H said...

Dear "I am not a grammar Nazi",

Your comment on the post "Gun Fight at the not OK Corral" was really hard to read. First off, I am actually from Texas, took Spanish for many years and am actually able to decipher what a "pinata" is with or without the proper accent mark. I'm confused by your confusion ... what did you think he was talking about? I don't think there is another word in spanish that is spelled the same way, uses a different accent mark - or no accent at all - and means something completely different. Or, was this "your" meager attempt to justify how little you really know and make yourself feel better and more superior? (By the way, the accent mark is called a "tilde", in case you didn't know, you asocial tool ... and by "tool" I don't mean a helpful instrument, so don't get "your" panties all in bunch and get all confused and shit. Look it up on urbandictionary.com)

G. B. Miller said...

For what its worth, that was a brilliantly written comment. It was pithy and got the attention of writer/blogger.

Almost none of the comments I've left in the past two years have ever warranted a blog post, so everyone should give this commenter kudos on doing what most of us can only aspire to.

Love Bites said...

Don't you love when someone leaves an anonymous rant much to do about nothing. Think Marilyn Monroe said it best, "When it comes down to it, I let them think what they want. If they care enough to bother with what I do, then I'm already better than them."
Maybe we should all chip in and buy anonymous a happy ending. Seems like someone is a bitter old fart. btw absolutely love your blog. - Love Bites @ summerpeterson.blogspot.com

Derby Wallus said...

Ummm...who the fuck cares how you correctly "Grammarize" the word pinata? I think as long as you have all the letters in the right order then you are golden. I understood what you were talking about just fine...there was absolutely no need to correct two little mistakes. It wasnt if you wer typin likes this and stuffs.


....Because that would most certainly be fucking annoying.

Just Plain Tired said...

Noble response. Persnickety fuckers always seem to be anonymous.

Amanda Panda said...

What a douche! Maybe you should focus more on your spelling than your grammar. You don't seem that much "learned" anyway. Nice response bitchy, however I would not have given him the satisfaction of responding.

Kelly said...

I refuse to believe this was actually about grammar. If it were, there would be thousands of other blogs on which (s)he could post.

Elise Lucie said...

I absolutely enjoyed your post, but the best part has to be the sixth comment someone made on it : "Dear Bitchy:I love you for this. I will marry you and have your babies. Thank you." Awesome!

Unknown said...

I suppose some people just don't have enough to do with their time. Considering I am actually an English Education major I feel that I have the right to say to this asshole that his correction of your grammatical errors do not actually account for shit. The first and only real rule that matters in the English language is that every rule has an exception. That said, if a reasonably smart person can understand you then you're speaking English just fine. Apparently this idiot isn't smart enough to comprehend English and should consider changing languages. I hear French is much more rule-bound and doesn't require a bit of thought to comprehend.

Tammy said...

Don't end sentences in a preposition; don't split infinitives...blah blah blah. I have taught and studied grammar for the past 15 years, and I am so TIRED of these Latin-based prescriptive grammar rules! How stupid is it that we correct each other according to rules based on a language with zero relationship to English?! It makes no sense. Not a Grammar Nazi can kiss my Grammar Queen ass. Besides, breakin' rules is fun.